Life beyond adultery

• White coats and blue overalls From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (1 day old)

  My body used to do exactly as it was told. I was healthy and supple, slim and full of energy. I have been very fat and monumentally happy about it. I have been extremely thin and still happy with … more

• Little and big lies, little and big love From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (3 days old)

  Pest n.1 asked me, when he was about two, how old I was. I removed ten years from my real age and gave him the number. For the last six years, then, Pest n.1 has been adding a year, diligently, at eac… more

• Sleep well, my darling From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (7 days old)

  Another day, another time Pest n.1 falls asleep on the school bus. Only this time I was not even there to pick him up. I was at the doctor's for an emergency (don't ask, it's all very dramatic and rig… more

• Will you? From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (10 days old)

  Will you love me When the grapes dissolve over the vineyard, When the feast of summer is all but a distan… more

• One needs a family chart From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (11 days old)

  Mr Mechanic had a little 'chat' with his boys. 'How would you feel if daddy married Lu?' He asked in the car, on the long journey to come over to us. Nowadays we spend the weekends together, and h… more

• Stolen from Miramaze. From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (11 days old)

  Stolen from Miramaze. A meme about sex. Oh yes. Talking about me and talking about sex, all wrapped into one. My idea of heaven. 1. Is there anyone of your friends that you would ever consider hav… more

• That place I used to go to From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (11 days old)

  I went to a place which used to make me feel great. Full of people, full of sin. Full of voices and full of silence. Mr Mechanic insisted. I did not know whether it would be suitable with four chi… more

• Quantum solace From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (13 days old)

  On to the MHP Motor Show. Train, tube. There and back. With four boys under nine. Now the fireworks. I have more energy now than I did when I was eighteen. And so much more love. … more

• The beauty of beautiful souls From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (14 days old)

  I have a childminder for Pest n.1 and n.2. Pest n.2 spends an inordinate amount of time with her. Let's call her Rosie. Pest n.1 gets occasionally picked up from the bus stop, and spends an hour o… more

• Power of photos From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (17 days old)

  I retrieved a few photo albums from my ex-marital home. Then I made the mistake of opening one. Then another. And another. Most photos are of my boys. The camera has followed their arrival into… more

• I feed you From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (18 days old)

  On holiday. Time to re-focus, re-group and re-consider. Time to gather and tie-up; re-assemble and shift around. I fold inside myself to look at life as it is now. I speak to people I have not… more

• Trick or treat? From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (20 days old)

  … more

• What cuts the deepest From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (20 days old)

  Again, if you do not see your partner, and do not know what comes next - no matter what a good idea of that you may have - the anticipation of it holds you suspended. Better than a slow strip-teas… more

• Where is my ego? From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (21 days old)

  He starts with my head. It gets covered by black, thin sheets of plastic. Secured with tape. I only have small, discreet holes to breathe, and none to see. One by one, my limbs get covered and tap… more

• the 'dementor' effect From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (22 days old)

  Do you have a person in your life whom you cannot get away from, and who draws all the (little) happiness you may have out of you? The 'dementor' effect, Mr Mechanic calls it. He has one. … more

• No holes, and a completely different kind of love From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (24 days old)

  He arrives with children, and bags full of shopping, and Hallowe'en stuff. We shall be having an early Hallowe'en evening with the children, as next week it is not our turn to be parents. My boys … more

• All about control From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (24 days old)

  How do you relinquish all control during intimacy? Could you... strip yourself free of your own identity? Could you... 'decide' to be an object of pleasure, for half an hour or so? And if … more

• Shut your mouth From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (30 days old)

  'Exactly how claustrophobic are you?' He asked. 'Rather a lot,' I replied. 'That'll be a challenge.' 'I'll bite you.' I said. 'You won't be able to, honey.' … more

• Black fantasies From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (31 days old)

  I always thought that a nice, sexy, raunchy set of naughty underwear MIGHT be used to strip a woman of her active role in love-making, and make her look, feel and... well..., just BE a sex object. Wit… more

• She who has come to stay From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (40 days old)

  I have not felt anger for years. Meet the dark lady. She owns me completely. … more

• The kissing monster From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (40 days old)

  We played the usual game today. It's called 'the Kissing Monster'. I find Pest n.1 and Pest n.2, who have been duly hiding in the cupboard or the wardrobe. If and when I find one or both, I am all… more

• Things you do for love From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (40 days old)

  When we arrived at his place, late and tired, Mr Mechanic was beaming. His children were ready to play with mine, Nintendoes at the ready too. The place was clean; the bucket and mop outside, dryi… more

• Sleep tight From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (41 days old)

  The bus driver motioned me to come closer. It was very late; the sun had gone down. The late bus takes the last stray children to their harrassed mothers, strained homework and late suppers. '… more

• No kicking From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (45 days old)

  I had a small operation last night. It had been booked, was not an emergency, and was of the invasive variety. I took some medication beforehand. I practised meditation. I had a hot bath. I told m… more

• Do not stop From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (45 days old)

  I have been receiving romantic emails for months. Each of them is movingly sweet and terribly decadent. It is his style, and it never rings hollow. Not even when I have been in bad, bad places wit… more

• What would you do for love? From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (47 days old)

  I made a steak and kidney pie for the first time in my life. What would love make you do? It wasn't the fact that I made the pie. Love made me eat some. … more

• I am hosting another voice From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (48 days old)

  Mr Mechanic is borrowing this space to write his own post. He dictates, I write (it avoids spelling mistakes). "This evening Lucrezia and I went to a local pub, where she was convinced that the lo… more

• Stolen from my blogging friend, yet another meme From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (48 days old)

  1 Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet? No 2. How do you flush the toilet in public? Is there a toilet so public that you do it in public? 3. Do you wear your seatbelt in t… more

• Order and drama From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (48 days old)

  It has been, so far, such an odd year. Challenging and difficult, hairy and breathlessly fast. Desperately slow and worryingly complicated. I have let go and I have held. I have been disappoin… more

• Handbrake on From lucreziaborgia ^Pro in Life beyond adultery (51 days old)

  The problem with artificial help is that you feel an artificial calm. A plastic serenity. A lycra elasticity of spirit. I am a remote controlled car and no longer a raucous, bedraggled and… more

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